Don’t know if anyone reads these but I’m at a point in my life where I can’t, REALLY CAN’T keep doing this. By this I mean dwelling on the negatives.

I took some time off Tumblr as I was getting too emotional. The emotions were becoming too negative. SO! I’ve returned to change it around one step at a time!! I’m sorry if I’ve ignored anyone who does read these, I hope you didn’t take offense.

with love, 

J-engel

Life is only as dramatic as you make it, everything is relative. This year is going to be another good year the only thing that I will do differently to last year is, 

                                                 Go with the flow &

                                                     Be positive

                                                      Be brave

                                           Change my perspective 

2016

- It will be as good or even better then 2015

- I will be going to Europe again but with my boyfriend this time <3

- This Christmas is going to be even better! (I hope!)

- 28: to grow with my bf! To grow as a couple <3

- Be positive. Be brave. Change your perspective if you can’t change your situation.

That last point is very interesting, I had a conversation with my brother a few days ago. He said something along the lines of you need to understand what motivates you and have reason to why you do what you do. There is an old lady who seems angry at the world or maybe at someone or something that makes her appear to disregard other people. She lives in her own little world as if she is on a mission and no one can change her. She is a strong little crazy old woman and I admire her. She may be an outcast in this world but to me she is a symbol for being yourself, sticking to your goals and values- to not let anyone sway you from it. If this little old lady were to change her views and snap out of this bubble of hers she would need to change her views to adapt to the new way she chooses to live her life. Nevertheless she makes me smile and for that I am grateful.

Anonymous asked: Ways to remember to be more aware?

thecalminside:

A ring or a bracelet may help. Something with some words on it to like, “Be here now” or “just breathe” I think would help. Notes around your personal space, maybe in the car or on the bathroom mirror or just places that you see often in your daily life. Maybe, set a reminder on your phone a few times a day to go off and remind you to just breathe and to relax and to just be. I doing think these things will help. You may find after a while that you don’t need the reminders and that you’ll just naturally start to remember to be more aware and more present.

~greg

happinessisinfinite:

• Riding on the back of an ATV along the cliffs on Santorini at sunset, with the wind through my hair and technology completely put away.
• Spending my weekend at Tomorrowland with the most amazing people ever that I felt like I had known forever.
• Hiking in the Swiss Alps
• Local greek guys trying to motivate me and encourage me to cliff jump in Santorini but I was scared. And when I finally did, they all cheered for me.
• Swimming in Vernazza with an amazing NZ guy, while tiny little jelly fish were in the water around us.
• Getting caked in Ibiza by Steve Aoki, being there by myself but yet everyone was cheering and pointing towards me while I was on some random British guys shoulders.
• Unexpectedly ending up at a trance show on a night out, and every single person was singing along to “Mr. Brightside” at the top of their lungs. 

Happiness and fun can be like a drug that you never want to get off and suffer withdrawals and get depression if you don’t have it. Can I have this drug for at least 65% - 70% of my life, please? If it’s possible, it’s the only thing I ask and wish for if I had a magic lantern. Or if I get into the mathematics of it and work out how to be positive 24/7 and control my environment and be the space for my emotions as well as discipline my mind and body? Is this sounding like mediation and the third eye thingo or what?

(Source: haithanhhcmpt)

spiritualinspiration:

“Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind…” (Romans 12:2, AMP)

Many people today don’t realize that the reason they’re not happy, the reason they’re not enjoying life is simply because they’ve trained their minds in the wrong direction. They’ve trained their minds to worry. They’ve trained their minds to complain. They’ve trained their minds to see the negative. But just as you can form these negative mindsets, you can retrain your mind according to the Word of God and form godly mindsets.

I believe one of the main keys to retraining your mind and developing a positive attitude is by learning to stay grateful. When you stay grateful, you are focusing on what’s right rather than what’s wrong. The seed of the Word takes root in the good ground of your heart. This doesn’t happen automatically, you have to discipline yourself. You have to make a conscious effort every single day until a good habit is formed.

Remember, when you live with an attitude of praise and thanksgiving, you are shielding yourself from the attacks of the enemy. The seeds of discouragement cannot take root in a grateful heart. Neither can bitterness, envy or strife. So today, retrain your mind and be empowered with His strength to overcome in every area of your life!

(Source: savedbymercyandgrace)

Anonymous asked: How do you love yourself ?

thecalminside:

Be, or become, someone that is easy to love, easy to fall in love with. Do things each day, each time you can, to move towards being someone that is easily loveable. Treat people kindly, smile, hold a door, be kind whenever possible. Do little things that can add up, this may take a bit of time, but do things that you are proud of. Do things that if you completely and honestly put them all down on a list, you wouldn’t feel shame or bad for those things, you’d be proud of them. It helps to start small, but these things ha can build and build, build momentum.

Be kind to yourself and know that your old ways have a momentum to them, the destructiveness in you has a momentum that takes time to run out and not run your life. Behind this destructiveness is usually pain of some kind, trauma or other hurt buried that comes out in these self destructive ways. If you do find there is pain there work to heal it. Work to apologize, forgive and understand others including yourself. This may take some time as well, start small and don’t take it on all at once, that might be too much.

Try to notice this destructiveness that lives in you, that lives in is all and see that it isn’t you, it is the momentum from past pain and suffering that wants more pain, more suffering. Try to see if this is true. Try to just breathe and bring your awareness to these bad things or destructive things as often as you can and see this whole thing in action. See the pull to do destructive things to your life and k ow that you can just be aware of them and not act them out. Seeing this in you breaks its control over you and you can move to do more productive and constructive things. You just won’t be controlled by it.

Question your thoughts and beliefs about life. See if they are true. Are they 100% true, is there a sliver of doubt in them. Are you fighting something that needs to be fought, is the fighting originating in some form of your own pain and suffering. Questioning thoughts brings a light to the dark in you and you can get to understanding of your own pain and suffering and the pain and suffering kid others and this is the seed of compassion for yourself and for others.

Try to be with yourself from time to time and just feel what you feel. We tend to run from our feelings at light-speed, we don’t like them, unless they are pleasant, we run and we run if they are uneasy. Try to just stop running from them for a bit and feel them. It is best to do this when you feel relatively good. This makes it easier. Relax and feel. Underneath those feelings, being the awareness of the feelings and not the feelings, brings something new in. A feeling of calm and stillness comes in when you bring your attention to your feelings and allow them to be there, when you just feel them. Feel them and not fight them, not run from them. Feeling this calm and peace, it is easier to do good things. It is easier to just be a better person, it seems this peaceful feeling wants to spread when it takes us over. It can spread out from us and affect others. The inside can be the outside and acting from this peaceful place can change things in your life. It can make it easier to be with yourself and feel love for your self.

I think starting a meditation practice can definitely help you move towards understanding and insight into yourself and others and can bring about some stillness in that stillness things, unusually helpful things, come up.

My current thoughts on this, I hope they are of some help.

~greg

I love his part -

“ old ways have a momentum to them, the destructiveness in you has a momentum that takes time to run out and not run your life. “

gingermoons:

The sunlight created strips of gold on the oceans surface..

I’m a badass bitch :]